The Predicament of “Otherness”

The Predicament of “Otherness”

Years ago, a Harvard sociology professor spoke on the subject of “taming barbarians.” He maintained that across many diverse cultures and throughout time, the future and stability of every civilization depended on it. Barbarians were defined as boys and men, ages 15-25.

Barbarians, he said, tend to live for self-serving, short-term goals. Girls and women—as child-bearers—are fundamentally more interested in building the future. And so the taming force for guys comes down to whether or not they form committed relationships—through marriage and parenting.

However, in modern times (read: birth control and promiscuity) many young women are short-term-goalers too. Just think how many sitcoms and reality shows depict 20 to 30-somethings acting like junior high kids—cheating, lying, backstabbing, and hooking up. A & E’s Crazy Hearts: Nashville premiered last night offering just that.

And so marriage and family structures are at risk on more than one front. Committed relationships are the glue in all societies, and the lack of them brings instability and downfall. History is fraught with examples.

Maybe you’re offended by this professor’s analysis. I tend to agree with him, though I don’t see it as a gender issue—rather a human condition.

In our carnal nature, we’d like everything to be centered around our life, with others fitting in accordingly. We want control of the channel-changer. We secretly turn the thermostat up or down to our liking. Movies like The Stepford Wives (1975) and the recently released film called, Her (2013), explore the idea of spouses and lovers created as an extension of ourselves. We want the world to be “personalized” for us.

Google, Amazon, and Siri are constantly forming their sense of what we want, echoing our desires back to us. Pandora will make a radio station just for you. Writer, Cass Sunstein, says that this kind of thing is a form of modern slavery. Similar to Huxley’s Brave New World, “people have lots of fun, but their lives lack meaning or genuine connection.” Their desire for pleasure is both “seductive and soul-destroying.”

Basically, we’d like to eliminate the wildcard of another’s “otherness.”Continue reading

An Enlarged Spirit

An Enlarged Spirit

I started composing this post while half asleep this morning. You know, that lucid state where your mind is active, but you’re not yet awake?

A random image formed in my mind’s eye. I believe it came from God. I pictured a man’s spirit floating like a vapor, contained by his body. His spirit actually looked compressed—as if created to be much larger than his human body.

Our physical bodies serve as temporary housing for our spirits. That much is obvious. But what captivated me this: while we’re here on earth, God wants us to develop a large spirit, full to the brim, and even overflowing.

The Bible talks a lot about humans having a soul, a spirit, and a body. These terms are commonplace throughout Scripture. Hebrews 4:12 distinguishes our souls as something different from our spirits, though some use these terms interchangeably.

John Paul Jackson teaches that the soul is our mind, our will and our emotions. Our spirit, on the other hand, is where wisdom, conscience, and communion with God are found. And of course, our body is our body.  Without going into any complex theology, I do believe two important things:

First, that the soul needs “saving” and healing. A sin-sick soul displays what we are without God.

And second, that we experience God mostly through our spirits. God is Spirit and communes with us through our spirits.

Why are these two points important? Because, to the extent that our souls are damaged and our spirits remain undeveloped, we don’t have very good “receivers” in terms of hearing God.Continue reading

Being Cherished

Being Cherished

Many years ago, I was sitting in a counselor’s office completely brokenhearted over my marriage. The counselor was a nice person, but she had no real guidance to offer. Her therapeutic approach involved hours of long-faced listening. After that, her advice was simple: “The answers are within you.”

Right. I wouldn’t have been there if that were so.

When you are broken, you stumble around looking for some kind of solace. I was vulnerable, and unfortunately, I received a lot of bad advice in those days.

But God is a God who sees. Hagar knew that. (Gen. 16:13)

On my last appointment with that particular counselor, something took me by surprise. She had me lean back on her couch and asked me to close my eyes. What now, I thought. She said, “I want you to think about your Higher Power, whatever that is for you.” I argued inside. Why was I paying good money for this?

But as she left me alone, I entered into a vision.Continue reading