Stopping Dominoes

Stopping Dominoes

It all began with Duncan taking a bath. Seated nearby at a table, a small group of middle-aged women discussed how his great-grandfather’s health had deteriorated. In fact, he was about to die. Duncan listened intently—he’d never met the man and didn’t know he was even alive.

The scene changed. The setting was northern Ohio where his father’s side of the family lives and farms. Duncan challenged his father with burning questions:

“How come we’ve never seen him? Why didn’t we spend time with him?” Shocked and distraught, Duncan wept hard tears.

His father listened but failed to give any answer.

Then Duncan met his great-grandfather. The man was tender and kind. His presence radiated unconditional love. It felt like being with God.

Walk“I want to give you a gun,” said the great-grandfather. “It will be the best gun you’ll ever have.” He smiled. “Why don’t you come out to the place?”

“How far it is?” asked Duncan.

“Eight miles.”

Duncan turned to question his father in dismay. “And we’ve never been out there to see him?” A crushing sense of loss overwhelmed Duncan, and he wept for a second time.

So they traveled to the great-grandfather’s farm, and the patriarch showed them around. Though elderly and failing, his manner remained full of warmth and lovingkindness—soothing Duncan’s longing for a father’s love and acceptance. His father was there but remained a silent figure.

The great-grandfather spoke again to Duncan. “Now you pick out one of these guns and shoot it—any one you want. It doesn’t matter. And it will be the best gun you ever had.”

The dream ended there. Duncan gave me permission to share it with you.

This was a significant dream. Continue reading

Creating Space

Creating Space

Headache“People, especially men, hate being alone with their thoughts,” said reporter Rachel Feltman in The Washington Post.[1] Humans would rather be distracted than endure solitude, according to a recent study. What’s really baffling is we’re talking about a fifteen-minute experiment!

“People usually think of mind-wandering as being a bad thing, because it interrupts when you’re trying to pay attention,” stated Timothy D. Wilson, a psychology professor at the University of Virginia and lead author of the study. “But we wanted to see what happens when mind-wandering is the goal.” The results showed that “people didn’t like it much and found it hard.”

That article amazed me. It’s not how I feel about solitude, but in a way, it shouldn’t be surprising. The modern world has morphed into a culture of distractions with the Internet, smartphones, and social media.

So what? Why does that matter?

Because, as Feltman pointed out, “the ability to let the mind wander has been linked to greater working memory and increased creativity.” A lot of creativity is about forming connections between things in an unfolding sequence.

In another study, MRI brain scans confirmed that certain parts of the brain’s cortex are wildly active when people rest, daydream or allow their minds to wander.[2] It makes sense when you think about dreams. The brain is awake, though our bodies are asleep. In the same way, our minds can work in a different way when Continue reading

Unplanned Honesty

Unplanned Honesty

He told them to open their Bibles, ignoring their muffled sighs. Teenagers.  You’d recognize their expressions—rolling eyes and sluggardly movements. The teacher read from James anyway:

“You who say, ‘Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business, and make money.’ Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, ‘If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.’”  James 4:13-15

He closed his Bible and solemnly told his students a personal example. His parents had wanted to be missionaries. Then, they both discovered they had cancer. Even our best plans, he explained, can be altered without warning. Little did the teacher know, that he would actually demonstrate his point.

He meant to give a well-thought-out Bible lesson with a meaningful illustration. The teaching was supposed to start and finish on time, like a Sunday sermon that ends by noon for the football game. Yet something totally unplanned happened.

photoAs he shared about his parents’ illnesses, his own grief welled up like a mighty, churning river and overflowed into the room. There he sat, weeping uncontrollably. The eighth-graders remained frozen in their seats, completely absorbed in the moment. Not a desk creaked. No one even dared to swallow.Continue reading